Week 4 Wrapup

Summary

Oh baby, what a week it was! Bill “The Mayor” just cruised through like a hot knife through butter, putting David from “Eifert for the Bradys” to shame with his 116.24 points while David stumbled in with a paltry 107.0 – like someone trying to run a marathon in flip-flops. Congrats, Bill, you’re like the only guy left in a bar at 2 AM who isn’t a complete disaster!

And let’s give it up for Alan and his band of misfits, “They Tookerrr Jobs,” who blasted Brian’s team so hard it might as well have been a marching band playing in a library! With 126.02 points, Alan’s strutting and preening while Brian sits there like he just found out his favorite pizza place closed down – sad and totally alone with his measly 91.38.

Tyler edged past Lee in a game that felt like watching turtles race, scoring 99.82 over Lee’s 98.6 – if this was a movie, it would be ‘Dumb and Dumber,’ not for the comedy, but because both were too stupid to figure out how to really score.

Now let’s talk about Chris and his land of misfit toys he calls “Fortes and Blounts,” with a mind-blowing 171.32 points! He crushed Nick M, the “Quiet Quitters,” like a nine-pin bowling-gutter, while Nick is left contemplating his life choices with a sad little 106.4 – dude, you should have retired in high school and saved your dignity!

And finally, Trevor watched his dreams go up in flames with a pitiful 89.28, thanks to Nick H, “The Saucy Sheriff,” who barely beat him at 91.0 - like winning a “fastest to get hit by a bus” competition. Just take a knee, Trevor; sometimes it’s best to just stay in the locker room. What a week, folks! - Fake Commish

Weekly Awards

Big Dick Award (Most Total Points) $$

Chris 171.32

Little Bitch Award (Fewest Total Points)

Trevor 89.28

Matchups Overview

Best and Worst for the Week

Best and Worst Positions for the Week