Week 2 Wrapup

Summary

Week 2 is in the books and boy oh boy, did we see some fireworks! Tyler came out like a man on an absolute MISSION, dropping a nuclear 146.2 points on poor Trevor’s head. That’s not just winning—that’s making a statement, taking names, and probably getting your own ticker-tape parade! Trevor limped in with 101.74, which isn’t even terrible, but when you’re standing next to Tyler’s explosion it looks like bringing a butter knife to a gunfight.

Nick H continued his strong start to the season, absolutely dismantling Bill with 130.76 points. Bill managed 103.32, which would’ve been a respectable showing in most weeks, but unfortunately for Bill, this wasn’t most weeks. It’s like showing up to karaoke night and singing pretty well, only to watch the next guy nail a perfect Bohemian Rhapsody—you’re not bad, you’re just unlucky enough to follow greatness.

Brian put together a nice performance with 126.6, taking down David’s 113.64 in what was actually the most competitive matchup of the week. Both of you came to play, both of you put up solid numbers, but at the end of the day someone’s gotta lose and David, buddy, that someone was you. Better luck next time, champ!

Lee handled Chris pretty easily with 120.52 to 98.62, and I gotta say—Chris, my man, you’re now 0-2 and those are some rough scores you’re putting up. It’s like watching someone try to start a lawnmower that just refuses to turn over. At some point you gotta ask yourself if maybe, just maybe, you should’ve drafted differently.

And then we have the luckiest son of a gun in the entire league this week: Nick M, who beat Alan by exactly ONE POINT. 100.5 to 99.5! That’s not skill, that’s not domination, that’s basically a coin flip that landed in Nick M’s favor. Alan, you have every right to be furious—you scored almost 100 points and still walked away with an L. That’s the kind of bad beat that makes you want to throw your phone across the room and take up knitting instead!

So congrats to Tyler for reminding us all what excellence looks like, and to Nick M for being the luckiest man alive. Everyone else—back to the drawing board! - Fake Commish

Weekly Awards

Big Dick Award (Most Total Points) $$

Tyler 146.2

Little Bitch Award (Fewest Total Points)

Chris 98.62

Matchups Overview

Best and Worst for the Week

Best and Worst Positions for the Week